I have ascertained an email. I cannot disclose how or who privies me this valuable information and I will not kick a gift horse in the mouth. Here is the email that was sent by Loki to a certain Married woman "Mims" who used to sing in the Choir.
Minister Loki: "The service was a disaster today Mims. I don’t know what happened in “Trading My Sorrows” but one of the pages was totally missing. Dammit! I looked like a complete fool. And that Herbert… that filthy, fat, bloated, self-absorbed, CROTCH. To make matters worse he pulled out all the stops on that stupid organ and drowned-out the entire band. I have no clue what in the HELL he was playing but it wasn’t the Praise song. He then totally ignored my cut off attempts, which made me look even more stupid. I could have kicked his fat ass right then and there. If it weren’t for his mother’s LARGE gifts to the music program in the past 20 years, he’d bee a gonner already. I knew when I accepted those recent gifts I might has well have tattooed she and Herbert's name on my chest with a header that read "Property of: Herbert and Momma Crotch"
"After the set, the pastor came to the podium and gave me a very dirty look. Well, he can go ta’ Hell! I am tired of tiptoeing around him. It was an honest mistake. Although my secretary is totally convinced she put every page in its place. Austin seems to think Herbert did it. I wouldn't doubt it one bit. Time to keep an eye on that fat preening turd."
I will keep you updated on what will be done with this information. Until then, know that the upper hand has been seized!
Friday, May 18, 2007
Posted by Herbert S. Crotch at 12:48 AM